The Impossible Soul

I'm starting to get pretty drained lately. I guess I don't have that drive in me that I used to have and it's been severely lacking lately. Part of me wishes that I could do more and a part of me wishes to just let everything go and start new. Sometimes everything just seems sort of helpless really, almost impossible. And before I turn this into some kind of bad Darcy post (because at least his posts are well written, albeit super personal), I know that there is still music to be found.

I know I mentioned year-end lists earlier. I think I have been able to slowly get somewhere with the process but even that feels futile. Maybe because it's officially become work in some sense but that would just be an excuse. Anyway, I went to All That Music the other day and hauled home 3 records. One of them was Sufjan Stevens' latest LP - which I have exhausted here already. "Impossible Soul" is that album's last song, all 25+ minutes of it. It's a gripping story and definite closure to the hugely grandiose statements Stevens made with The Age of Adz. I recently got a jolt to relisten to the words when someone smart mentioned just how powerful the lyrics really are, until next time - Bryan

Sufjan Stevens - The Age of Adz

It’s starting to get cold outside and fall is usually my favorite season but for the start of this one I feel a bit distant. I wish I could pinpoint it, for I know it’s something that should pass soon. Until then, there are always specific bands and artists who simply do it for me in the fall – Sufjan Stevens being one of them. His new album The Age of Adz was just sent to reviewers and is now available to stream at NPR. It’s a drastically different sound from his earlier “state albums” and mostly, an entirely new direction. Much of the inspiration comes from a schizophrenic artist that Stevens’ channels, while still drawing comparisons and references to his own life. In short, it’s pretty special.

“I Walked” is yes, your typical ‘love hurts’ kind of heartbreak song. He’s singing about walking because he has no other choice and mostly because she’s decided to walk, what else is he to do. I’m always amazed that musicians who make beautiful music could possibly be singing about some of the same things I’ve lived before; it seems suddenly surreal. When he sings, “I am sorry the worst has arrived. For I'm on the floor…in the room where we made it that last touch of the night,” you can envision him lying on the floor after he’s probably called her and begged her to come back. It’s incredibly depressing but the music is just so soothing, as if everything is going to be OK, even when it seems so hopeless: “I should not be so lost, but I've got nothing left to love.”

The title track is probably one of the most ambitious songs on the album and even that sounds unfair because most of everything that Stevens does is ambitious in some kind of form. This is an epic, orchestral, twisting and ever-evolving song that delves into huge, soaring highs. I love how everyone sings that “this is the age of adz…eternal living!” before going into wild horn lines and belting choral passages. I also think that this song is where Stevens’ shows off his newly confident and inspired singing voice. Personally, I love the words, especially the last line when he asks to be forgiving for having selfish thoughts, “It’s only that I still love you deeply, it’s all the love I got.” Mostly, “For what you see is not fantasy. It's not what it gets, but gives,” what a great message to rally behind, even when everything seems so coldly unsure. – Bryan